You’re venturing into the territory of open relationships. You’re excited about the possibilities, and also a little bit nervous because it’s all new to you, and you have no idea what you’re doing. Relax. The good news is that it’s relatively easy to make an open relationship work. Once you know the ropes, it will be easy to maintain a relationship that is fun, spontaneous, and free of drama. While all of this may seem foreign to you right now, most of it is just common sense, and before long it will feel like second nature. Here’s how to ensure that your open relationship is a good experience.

Set Expectations at the Beginning

The very beginning of your open relationship sets the stage for the way the whole thing will go. This is why it’s so important to put in the work going into it. Open relationships mean different things to different people, so it’s really important that you talk frankly about exactly what it is you want. Make sure you’re both on the same page so there aren’t any misunderstandings. If to you an open relationship means you just meet up for sex on a regular basis, but the rest of your lives are totally separate, say so! If the woman thinks that an open relationship means that you’re both free to have sex with other people, but otherwise you’ll be a couple in every sense of the word, that’s a definite mismatch, and there are going to be hurt feelings and disappointment down the road. Maybe you don’t want to hear about the other guys she’s sleeping with, but she’d be totally turned on if you tell you about the women you’re having sex with. These things need to be talked about. Do it now and avoid problems later.

Treat Her with Respect

Just because she’s down with open sexuality doesn’t mean she wants you to treat her like a whore. In other words, just don’t be a jerk. Even if the only time you ever see each other is to get busy in the bedroom, decency is in order. If you’re rude and demeaning, chances are high that she’s not going to come back for more. There are a lot of guys out there looking for open relationships, and women know that. If you’re not treating them decently, they’ll bounce out and find sex buddies who will. This should be common sense, but unfortunately, there are a lot of dudes who didn’t get the memo and think an open relationship means that she’s just your sex toy.

Take Her Pleasure Seriously

Remember that an open relationship is a two-way street. Yes, you want to get yours, and that’s cool. Just make sure she’s getting hers, too. The more pleasure you bring to her, the more effort she’s going to put into pleasuring you. Some of the best sex I’ve ever had has been the result of spending a lot of time perfecting my skills and then using them to make sure that the woman I was with had multiple orgasms before I even let her touch me. In every single case, they have all reciprocated in some pretty mind blowing ways. Keep her on her toes. Try new positions. Work on increasing your stamina. Act out fantasies with her. Surprise her by doing something totally unexpected. This is the kind of thing that makes women lose their inhibitions and get wild in the bedroom. So pleasure her to the best of your ability and watch her inner freak emerge.
 

Keep It Fun and Light

The great thing about open relationships is that they tend to be a lot more fun. If a woman wants an open relationship, it’s a safe bet that she wants your time together to be light and easy. She’s probably not going to stick around if you’re sullen, irritable, or a total stick in the mud. And who could blame her? Would you want an open relationship with a woman like that? Hell no, you wouldn’t. You want great sex, maybe some shared laughs, and to leave in a better mood than when you walked through the door. She wants the same thing. Don’t text her griping about your awful day. Text her something silly and sexy. If it’s not going to either turn her on or make her laugh, think twice about why you’re sending it. The more fun you have together, the longer you’ll both want to keep it going.

Keep the Lines of Communication Open

Setting expectations at the beginning is a great start, but it’s just the start. Remember to keep checking in throughout your open relationship. Tell her what’s working for you and if there’s anything that’s not working. Let her know that you appreciate your time together. Ask her if there’s anything that could be better for her. She’ll be happy that you initiated the conversation, and you’ll gain valuable insights that can keep your open relationship in tip-top shape.

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