In essence, having an open relationship means that you are interested in having more than one sexual relationship at one time. While far from commonplace, this type of relationship is becoming increasingly more acceptable. The relationship may be unusual but the feelings that accompany it are not. Even when open relationship boundaries are clearly stated, one of the partners is bound to get jealous at some point. Often thought of as a single emotion, it may be more accurate to think of jealousy as many emotions merged together. Feelings of inadequacy, powerlessness, loneliness, depression, anger, fear, envy, covetousness, paranoia, anxiety, betrayal, and exclusion can all be a part of what you feel when you feel jealous. Jealousy can destroy all types of relationships and usually does once it comes into play. They to not letting it destroy the fun and exciting open relationship is to realize jealousy will occur to some degree, plan for it and act accordingly no matter how hard it may be. Are you ready for that? Good. Let’s get started.

Accept and Acknowledge

Monogamous couples do not have the market on jealousy. It is easy for you to kick yourself over feeling jealous in an open relationship. I mean, this is what you signed up for, right? The truth is, jealousy occurs in every type of relationship and with both genders. Do yourself a favor and realize it’s OK to feel jealous. You need a little internal dialogue like; whoa! What’s that? I’m feeling a little jealous here. That sucks. Once you acknowledge the fact that you’re feeling some jealousy, you’re ready to move on, confront it and learn to deal with it successfully.

Identify Your Feelings

Your first step is to identify your feelings. This calls for a lot of quiet introspection, something us men are not always willing to do. If you plan on keeping things cool with the woman in question, however, it is a necessity. You don’t have to be a lone but you should not be in female company. Think about how your feelings and examine their origins. What happened to make you react emotionally? Scrutinize the situation and evaluate your feelings. Are you pissed off? Do you feel sad? Are you experiencing anger? What is the overall, defining emotion you experience when you’re jealous? Knowing this one small fact can take the mystery out of why you are feeling jealous in an open relationship and help you pinpoint the underlying reasons. Jealousy is essentially about our own insecurities and fears. You will never be able to control feelings of jealousy without finding out where they are coming from.

Communicate

Communication is always important. In every relationship, with both genders, in business and in private lives; communication is important. People’s minds all work differently and interpret the same situation different from the next person. Even if you know someone very well, you cannot always accurately predict their actions and behavior. When you are feeling a pang of jealousy, talk to her. It doesn’t have to be a heartfelt sit-down but just a few words to reinforce your confidence. You’ve dissected your jealousy and you know exactly what is bothering you and making you jealous. Reinforce your confidence in yourself and the relationship by asking her for confirmation.

Pinpoint Your Triggers

There are trigger points that set off your jealousy. It may be when she texts her ex or when her boss hugs her as she leaves work. Think about when you feel the most jealous and what sets it off. Learning to see those instances coming and prepare for them makes a big difference. When you know you’re going to see her sitting across the table from you with that pleased smile, texting her ex-boyfriend, you can mentally prepare yourself and plan alternate activities to occupy your mind.

Avoidance

The last tactic you should use is avoidance. It is most often best to confront a jealousy situation and deal with it head on. However, if that isn’t an option you can always avoid the situation entirely. If it is another man or individual that pushes your buttons, don’t attend events where he will be present. If her boss flirts with her, don’t accompany her to company picnic. Catch my drift?

The biggest part of overcoming jealousy in an open relationship is realizing it is bound to happen and being prepared to deal with it. It doesn’t have to be the end of the open relationship.

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